Royal Enfield tool opens your beer bottle

I was perplexed when I opened the wooden Royal Enfield box to find 

what appeared to be a round medallion with the Made Like a Gun branding. 

Lovely. But what was it for? 

 Friends, today we depart from our usual subject of Royal Enfield motorcycles to examine a set of tools, partly obsolete, but certainly nostalgic in the hearts of most motorcyclists.

 "Church keys," we call them in the U.S. The term refers to the usually small tools that open beer bottles, beer cans or both. 

 We won't quite be leaving the subject of Royal Enfield, however, as my all-time favorite beer bottle opener is one that came to me as swag at the release of the Royal Enfield 650 twins at Santa Cruz, Calif. in 2018.

That round medallion inside the wooden box had a small magnet attached at the back, so it could stick on the refrigerator. That was the clue. The mysterious hole below the magnet opens beer bottles!

Back of medallion is a beer bottle opener.
Round button at top is a magnet to hold it to the fridge. 

It was a church key!

Proper church keys used to open beer cans as well, before the appearance of pop-tops (now properly called stay-tops because the pull tops don't separate from the can). Pop-tops came along in the 1960s.

Before then the openers were often, but not always, double-ended tools. One end took the cap off a beer bottle. The other end gouged a savage triangular hole in a beer can.

The need to open beer cans is now gone, but the bottle-opener end remains useful.

Yes, today some beer bottles come with twist-off caps requiring no tool except the human hand to open. But those beers tend to be the mass produced varieties. Craft beer in bottles will generally require a tool.

Or, if you don't have the tool handy, there is a technique you can use that involves slapping the bottle down hard with the cap caught on the edge of a counter top. I do not recommend this, but I have known it to work. Expect to get wet.

I do not claim to be an expert, but I have built a small collection of openers that appeal to me. Some people really do collect these things in earnest and in fact are experts on the topic.

For now, all I ask is that you peruse photos of my small personal assembly of openers. The captions tell the stories behind them.

Top two are "Quick and Easy" openers but note difference in design allowing the top opener to have a round hole so it can hang on a nail. Third down is an EKCO Safe Edge Can Opener that cleverly adds the nail hole to the curve of the end that opens bottles. Bottom opener does cans only and is unlabeled except for a U.S.A. Patent Number that dates to 1935. As a can-only opener it must pre-date the pop-tops of the 1960s.

In my appreciation for openers, one thing I have not done is to attach one of the normally wall-mounted bottle openers to my motorcycle, for use "on the road." This is occasionally seen on customized choppers and such.

While the look of this appeals to me, in practice I do not like drilling screw holes into my motorcycle.

Also, and with some regret, I personally will not ride after imbibing. I don't want the temptation to do so attached to my Royal Enfield.

Top and bottom are variations on openers that incorporate cork screws. The top one is labelled "Tap Boy." The middle "Miracle Roll" opener isn't really for beer cans, as it removes the entire top of a can (useful for cans of beans). But note that its lever arm includes a shape that opens beer bottles.

Big openers. Unlabeled opener on left has a leather wrapped handle. Plastic opener at center has a handle that imitates tree bark and is labelled "Yellowstone National Park." Picked up by my wife's family on a trip there 50 years ago. Unlabeled opener at right looks like a fish! These are often found marked as made in Japan but mine is not. Curved Amstel Light opener at bottom is light alloy, opens bottles only, and is made in Taiwan but I like it. Like all bottle-only openers it in effect acknowledges that cans haven't needed openers in a long time.

Openers labelled with brewery names. From top they are Jacob Ruppert Brewery, New York (out of business in 1965); Schlitz, The Beer That Made Milwaukee Famous (its Milwaukee brewery closed in 1981); Hamm's Beer, From the land of sky blue waters (its Minnesota brewery closed in 1997, ending connection to sky blue water); Stroh's Beer, A Quality Opener For A Quality Product (its Detroit brewery closed in 1985); and Schmidt Beer of St. Paul (the Schmidt's name came down from the St. Paul Brewery in 1991).

When England banned gin, and Royal Enfield was born

Debauchery and death stalk Gin Lane in William Hogarth's 1751 illustration.
But what does the craze for gin in 18th Century England have to do with Royal Enfield?
Note that the name of the cellar pub, bottom left, is "Gin Royal."

Royal Enfield motorcycles and an expensive bottle of American gin I got as a birthday present recently have something in common.

That something is the Gin Act of 1751, enacted by Parliament in an effort to sober up a British public besotted in an era the history books refer to as "The Gin Craze."

Gin, then newly introduced to Britain, more profitable to make than beer, and patriotic to drink (compared to French brandy) had become wildly — dangerously — popular. English artist William Hogarth blasted the harm gin did in his 1751 illustration "Gin Lane."

It was captioned, in verse:

"Gin, cursed Fiend, with Fury fraught
Makes human Race a Prey
It enters by a deadly Draught
And steals our Life away."

The Gin Act of 1751 would fail. (That is its connection to my expensive bottle of gin, which I will explain below).

The connection to Royal Enfields is what happened when Parliament came up with a better plan: replace gin — with beer.

I encountered this story in the October/November issue of The Gun, the magazine of the Royal Enfield Owners Club UK. It contains the article "How Royal Enfield Began," by Anne Bradford. She writes:

"The government was anxious to get the nation off gin and on to beer, said to be healthier; also, the growing of hops and their brewing was good for the economy. Consequently, the Beerhouse Act of 1830 was passed. It allowed anyone of good character to brew and sell beer either from a public house or their own home..."

One of the people who made money doing this in Redditch, England was George Townsend, the son of a needle maker. He made enough money from his brewing vat to open a little needle factory. After his death, his son, George Townsend II, took over.

Barr Hill Tom Cat gin.

Next comes "a whiff of scandal," Bradford writes, as George Townsend II and Foster Townsend (illegitimate son of George's housekeeper) begin a bicycle business together.

Initially successful, they lost control of the company in bankruptcy and the financiers brought in Robert Walker Smith, "a brilliant engineer," and Albert Eadie, "the best salesman England had ever known."

A job making small parts for Enfield rifles put the company back on its feet and the firm's bicycle was named "The Enfield" to celebrate. Salesman Eadie added "Royal" because it sounded upmarket.

Now what about that costly bottle of gin my daughter Anna bought me for my birthday?

The gin is Barr Hill, Tom Cat Gin, by Caledonia Spirits in Vermont. The bottle carries this entrancing story:

"Tom Cat is the modern day adaptation of 18th Century England's most revered spirit, Old Tom Gin. After gin was outlawed by the Spirits Act of 1750, rebellious pub owners would hang a wooden plaque shaped like a black cat to inform the passerby of their defiance of the ban. Deposit a few pennies through the cat's mouth and a bartender would pour a ration of Old Tom to be sipped through a tube between the cat's paws."

Strictly accurate? Maybe not the recipe, since this American gin is expensive, meant to be savored rather than guzzled, distilled with honey and barreled in oak. It's dark in color whereas most gins are clear or nearly so.

But the part about the penny eating cat may be true. In Hogarth's 1751 illustration of Gin Lane is shown a pub advertising this slogan:

"Drunk for a penny
Dead Drunk for twopence
Clean straw for nothing."

The name of the pub is "Gin Royal." It probably sounded upmarket.

More about the craze for gin, then and now, can be found in this article in the New Yorker magazine.

Does Royal Enfield need a craft beer of its own?

Harley-Davidson beers of 1990 and 2018 and a proposal for Royal Enfield.

Earlier this year my brother- and sister-in-law brought me a special gift from Milwaukee: a four-pack of Harley-Davidson "115th Anniversary Milwaukee Lager."

Maybe Harley should get into the beer business: that stuff was good!

The beer was a "collaborative local craft beer," produced by Milwaukee Brewing Co., Third Space Brewing and Good City Brewing Co.

It was a special release for Harley's 115th anniversary during Labor Day weekend 2018, and was available in Wisconsin "while supplies last." They should have kept making it.

I'm no beverage expert but I found the 115th Anniversary brew light, slightly sweet, and with a nice suggestion of fruit flavor. This would please a lot of people — no bad thing.

It was worth drinking, not just something to drink. This was a pleasant surprise. You know that lots of people would just want to empty the can so they can add it to their collection of all things Harley. Yes, this was actually suggested in coverage of the event at the time.

I also liked that it came in full pint cans, not because it's a bigger bang, but because having a pint with a friend is usually enough. The design of the can was a little too subtle, I thought. It's hard to take a photograph of it. The eagle image on the can has been described as "tattoo style."

In 1990 I got hold of some cans of Harley-Davidson "Heavy Beer," a promotional item at the Daytona 500. It made a great souvenir of the race.

 According to one article, that beer was meant as an "anti-light beer." It was supposed to have more calories. At the time I didn't think it was special but back then I generally didn't care what beer tasted like. I just liked beer.

I won't ever have a beer and then go ride my motorcycle. But I do think a branded beer is a great way to promote a motorcycle company.

In fact, my daughter Anna even created a series of Royal Enfield themed labels and pasted them on bottles of beer as a Christmas gift for me in 2011.

Here were her suggestions for Royal Enfield:

Maj. Bunty Ale.

War Time Best Bitter ("Made Like a Gun").

Flying Flea IPA ("Brewed Like a Gun").

Royal Enfield Rocker Stout.

Pilot Light Pilsner.

Cheers! Royal Enfield inspires great beer labels

There's no better beer than a Royal Enfield.

Make mine a Royal Enfield!

When I go to the refrigerator now I can choose from:

Maj. Bunty Ale ("Brewed in Chennai").
War Time Best Bitter ("Made Like a Gun")
Flying Flea IPA ("Brewed Like a Gun")
Royal Enfield Oil Spill IPA
Royal Enfield Rocker Stout
Or, my current favorite, Pilot Light Pilsner

These choice beers came as a Christmas gift from my daughter Anna. Each has a colorful label evoking the joys of riding a Royal Enfield (perhaps not so much with the Oil Spill IPA). I consume them in an "official" Royal Enfield beer glass presented to me by daughter Erin on an earlier occasion.

Which Royal Enfield beer to choose? Luckily they all taste the same!

Would the Mad Major "Bunty" Golightly approve of the taste of Maj. Bunty Ale?

That depends on whether he enjoys Yuengling Traditional Lager. Each of the six beers Anna gifted me with tastes exactly like Yuengling Traditional Lager.

It's a case of badge engineering: her mother soaked the labels off a six-pack of Yuengling and Anna applied her label designs and gift wrapping.

You can make your own beer labels online at Beer Labelizer or Labeley.

This is the point at which you'd expect me to say "it's easy!" It's not. The web sites work well, but my efforts produced nothing nearly as neat as Anna produced.

Look at the time! Believe I'll crack open a Flying Flea IPA.